It’s the lack of sleep.  It’s the people I just walked away from.  It’s financial strain.  It’s wanting another baby, but knowing it won’t happen.  It’s the stress of the impending relocation.  It’s the physical exhaustion.  It is the physical taxation of not eating the way I should.  All of those things invited it here.  Too bad it is not welcome.

          It came this morning when I was folding laundry and it hasn’t gone away.  It works itself out so that every seemingly loose end is tied up nicely, topping off the sweetest little package.  It comforts me and gives me an option.  It gives me control over the chaos that has engulfed me the last few months.  It invites and entices with empty promises.

          It’s not welcome.

          While there is no doubt it warms me, it’s radioactive warmth.  It poisons.  While it swaddles me like a baby, it suffocates.

          It was not welcome before, and it is not welcome now.  I don’t know what made it think it could waltz back in here and make itself so appealing that I would jump on it, but it’s here, just the same.  It’s here.

          It’s in my dreams and in my every waking thought.  Details.  Loose ends.  Specifics.  Aftermath…

          Warmth…

          It’s not welcome…  For the moment. 

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine
You look so beautiful tonight
Reminds me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Pieces

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
I’m in your reach
You held me in your hands

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
and let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
to make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(and let me rest in peices)
would you find it in your heart
and let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

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