Sorry I haven’t been myself lately.  After getting too drunk for my own good and just trying to get things back in order, I found myself even more out of sorts than usual.  Anyway, I am back to…  well…  back to normal for me.


I have a few serious things going on right now that I am not sure how to deal with.  I have a friend who isn’t a close friend, but is someone I care about and have spent time with and plan to continue to be friends and spend time with.  This friend has begun exhibiting some behaviors that worry me a lot.  At first, I didn’t think anything about when she said she wanted to lose weight.  I can count on one hand the number of women I know who are comfortable at their current size, or who are not unhappy about some aspect of their physical appearance.   It started to bother me when she wanted to continue to lose weight after getting back to a healthy, what-should-be-comfortable weight.  When I say a "weight that should be comfortable," I mean bordering on thin, underweight, less than what her frame is meant for.  She looks healthy!  She started taking a drug typically prescribed for people who are grossly obese.  My first thought was, "What imbecile gave her that prescription?!" and my second thought was, "What the hell made her think she needed THAT?!"  I don’t know  what to do.  She sleeps a lot because she’s exhausted.  She’s exhausted because she works and barely eats.  We’re talking a piece of toast and a handful of Skittles, people…  So what do I do?  I don’t know if it’s a male influence that is unhealthy, I doubt very highly it is her family, but maybe it’s another friend…  I just don’t know what to do to help her.  I think she is going to make herself very sick if she continues to eat, or rather, not eat the way she is.  She is going to seriously harm her body…  Should I just be blunt and express my concern for her health and well-being?  Should I try to talk to some of her other friends or family members and see if it really is as bad as I think before I open my big mouth?  I don’t think keeping quiet is okay in this instance…  So what do I do?

          Then I have another friend.  She can’t see the freaking forest for the trees.  She has been handed so many great things and opportunities, but she continues to make her situation worse, or just do things that won’t improve it.  I confronted her once and she said she knew she was very fortunate to have such giving people in her life, but she has continued to exhibit this sense of entitlement and even displays anger when things aren’t given to her, or taken care of for her.  One on hand, I want to help her and try to keep doing things for her, but on the other, I have never been one to help people who won’t help themselves.  At first, I thought she really was trying to help herself – that what she said was true and that she was grateful and wanted to do those things for herself.  But the more time I spend with her, the less my intuition tells me that that is truly the case.  It seems as though she feels certain actions, good or bad, have entitled her to certain things from other people.  Half the time, these people have no clue, or don’t care, and the other half, they are pretty much where I am – tired of feeling like they are being taken advantage of.  So what do I do?  Do I just quit helping her cold-turkey?  Do I confront her again and tell her how I feel?  Or do I just keep helping her, hope I am wrong about her being a slacker, and when she does climb out of her slump, be happy I could help her? 

          And then there’s me…  I am trying to organize myself mentally for what is ahead, which is, potentially, a big move because the base we’re currently stationed to is full and the next closest base is also full.  On one hand, I am very excited because it means we have a shot, albeit a small one, at going to San Diego or one other place on the west coast.  On the other hand, I am terrified because it means we will most likely end up in a place where I know no one.  Yes, I can be a very social person, and I can make friends easily.  But I can also be very shy and it’s hard to meet people when you don’t "work" outside the home on a daily basis.  I also know it will take me a while to learn the ropes and figure out where every thing is, how much our cost of living will increase/decrease, and just how to go about day-to-day things…  I know it seems like I am counting my chickens before they hatch, but that’s just me…  I always worry in advance.  Always.  It could be something completely mundane that I have done a million times, and I will still worry.  So anyway, I have been thinking about that a lot lately and it totally freaks me out.  You would think, being a military brat, I’d be a pro at moving…  But I hate it.  I really do.  I am not looking forward to this at all…  So many things are in upheaval or just states of chaos right now.  I hate chaos.  And yet I have children!  Male children at that!  HA!

          So, gentle reader, pray, chant, think on, whatever…  Just keep me in your thoughts and think of me keeping my sanity in tact….  please.